Humour is always a very personal thing at the best of times but each of these clips made me laugh – how clueless people not working directly in IT are and how dodgy IT guys quickly become when put on the spot. I probably like this series so much because it also reminds me a little of my offline mateship with the other chief Voodoonista – Midnight.

I think it’d be fair to say there is a little bit of Midnight lurking within the dodgy IT boffin character (swap Halo for Viv’5) and I hate to confess it but there is a lot of ‘Chip from Sales’ in me … sure …it’s ugly but that doesn’t make it any less real. It’s a pity that there only a few webisodes in the series – you’ll find them embedded below for your entertainment.

Quick standard warning for Midnight’s Mum and anyone else sensitive about language – there is some… I mean not a lot but there is some… you’d probably hear worse down the street buying a paper or a coffee but still…

So… you have no internet connection… except when I uh kinda have it… my password? Sure, it is P…A…S…S…W…O…R…D.

Excel hell with sales warrior aka toerag Chip Morehead… it’s okay to call IT help center if it is a mission critical customer facing issue… and we have to ask – is your keyboard pluggedin.

Look to be fair on Chip – formating with excel will break the will of any grown man.

the calm soothing tones of the Indian call center guy… hmmm makes me feel like a HDD sandwich.

Chip strikes again – Nancy Johnson-Johnson… love the question ‘is your call really necessary’, the phrase ‘Data Center Gangster’ and of course placing all the blame on a sudden and unexpected (fake) virus attack… man. I suspected they did this and now I know they do!

Enjoyed? sadly only four webisodes so far but you never know what will happen in the future.

Apparently this series won the Webby 2009 awards which is, I’m told, a big thing!

Check out the website (unless it is down) at http://www.thewebsiteisdown.com/

The vid’ is from the same crazy Lonely Planet dudes that brought us the err classics ‘I’m On A Boat’ and ‘_izz in My Pants’… Yeah… so it kinda goes without saying – if your easily offended then you need to quickly click on this link and browse away. 

For me – this clip made made me want to strut around in front of my imaginery minions and declare “I’m…da’…Boss!”…and then go out and find the workplace of some poor girl called Debra… in terms of the axing of my balls and the fish sex… not so much. Enjoy Voodoonistas!

On a more positive note, I’ve read that ‘Heros’ has been canceled. Thank you Grods. Which leads me to pose the random question that always enters my head when I think of Lost and Heros and that is… how cool is Barney on How I Met Your Mother… go the Bro’ Code! …and the seriously cute Robin.

I’d thank and credit the author but that seems to have been lost as this email has churned it’s way around the globe but whoever wrote it – kudos!

29 UNIVERSAL  TRUTHS
1. I think part of a best  friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you  die.

2. Nothing sucks more than  that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

3. I totally take back all  those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a  sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you  supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive  really necessary?

7. Obituaries would be a lot  more interesting if they told you how the person died.

8. I can’t remember the last  time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

9. Bad decisions make good  stories.

10. You never know when it  will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren’t  going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

11. Can we all just agree to  ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don’t want to have to restart my  collection … again.

12. I’m always slightly  terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes  to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes  to.

13. “Do not machine wash or  tumble dry” means I will never wash this – ever.

14. I hate when I just miss  a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call  back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn’t  answer? Drop the phone and run away?

15. I hate leaving my house  confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire  day. What a waste.

16. I keep some people’s  phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they  call.

17. I think the freezer  deserves a light as well.

18. I wish Google Maps had  an “Avoid ” routing option.

19. Sometimes, I’ll watch a  movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what  the heck was going on when I first saw it.

20. I would rather try to  carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my  groceries in.

21. I have a hard time  deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

22. How many times is it  appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still  didn’t hear or understand a word they said?

23. I love the sense of  camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent an a ** from cutting  in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

24. Shirts get dirty.  Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them  forever.

25. Is it just me or do high  school kids get dumber & dumber every year?

26. There’s no worse feeling  than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair  back a little too far.

27. As a driver I hate  pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of  transportation, I always hate cyclists.

28. Sometimes I’ll look down  at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it  is.

29. Even under ideal  conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding  their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet my behind  everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7  seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

So be well warned – come the 25th this month, all Geeks, and those that harbor geek tendencies who are yet to come out of the IT Support closet, will be stepping up and out from behind their computer screens. And then…

They’ll come out of comic book, a little more slowly out of the gaming stores, they’ll setting aside their handheld device with steely conviction, and as one proudly bellowing ‘Hazzar!’ along with chest beating and complicated hand shakes before scampering off for poptarts or cheese powdered crunchy bits.

Now of course if you feel really kinda motivated, you could actually participate in more formal Geek Pride activities. But before you take this step, best you swat up on the Geek Pride Manifesto created to celebrate the day. The key elements such as the basic rights and responsibilities of geeks are detailed as follows -

Rights:

1. The right to be even geekier.
2. The right to not leave your house.
3. The right to not have a significant other and to be a virgin.
4. The right to not like football or any other sport.
5. The right to associate with other nerds.
6. The right to have few friends (or none at all).
7. The right to have all the geeky friends that you want.
8. The right to not be “in-style.”
9. The right to be overweight and have poor eyesight.
10. The right to show off your geekiness.
11. The right to take over the world.

Responsibilities:

1. Be a geek, no matter what.
2. Try to be nerdier than anyone else.
3. If there is a discussion about something geeky, you must give your opinion.
4. Save any and all geeky things you have.
5. Do everything you can to show off your geeky stuff as though it were a “museum of geekiness.”
6. Don’t be a generalized geek. You must specialize in something.
7. Attend every nerdy movie on opening night and buy every geeky book before anyone else.

But okay – are you actually a Geek? Check out the matrix below and see where you or someone you know that you suspect of carrying the Geek DNA and make a quick assessment.

For some non-geek ladies that have read the above manifesto, they may find a geek a more attractive proposition. If so, feel free to pop over to this SITE for a funny and kinda sweet ‘how-to-nab-a-geek’ guide.  Sadly I recognized a lot of former boyfriends in this… oh dear.

With that in mind and with the expectation that there may be some empowered frisky Geeks smothered in Old Spice on the loose this 25th, you may find it informative to consult the following Geek dating chart… it all now makes so much sense. Funny yet disturbingly rings true.

Source Notes:
The dating geek chart is courtesy of the fab website www.gossipgamers.com and the Geek Matrix is courtesy of this SITE. All other images from http://vi.sualize.us/

The manifesto of Geek Pride Day is courtesy of the font of most instant knowledge – Wikipedia. The history of the day can also be found HERE .

For my mind their are two that are really worth a look whenever new material is released – the guys and gals at College Humor and the three geeky lads at Lonely Island.

In recent times these different comedy outfits have stood out with their distinct styles and really good output. The following are in my humble opinion their best efforts so far.

College Humor had a go at ‘modernizing’ the signature song from the musical theatre classic “West Side Story” with their version titled “Web Site Story”. Plain good IT-geekery fun for all… and it doesn’t hurt that the girls are also easy on the eye. For me anyway…

The second all time personal favorite clip, so far, is the Lonely Island clip titled “I’m On A Boat”… which kinda became a massive hit on youtube and featured the always charismatic and ‘unique’ dressed T-Pain providing the errr ummm music cred’.

Now before you are tempted to click the play button with this one – please be advised that this clip has extensive explicit language… I repeat if you are in any shape or form offended by explicit language… swear words then you may seriously want to pass on this clip.

For those with a more robust constitution – and can live with the rabid bleeping, then click-it and kick-it with the T-Pain and the Lonely Island guys as they share their maritime experience.

* Another funnee doing the email circuits worthy of Voodoonosity membership. Bit dated but funnee…

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.”

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.

Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to a “Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the English issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588 when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get the Bastards” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide”. The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France ‘s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability.

It’s not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout loudly and excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans also increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose”.

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Americans meanwhile and as usual are carrying out pre-emptive strikes, on all of their allies, just in case.

And in the southern hemisphere…

New Zealand has also raised its security levels – from “baaa” to “BAAAA!”.
Due to continuing defense cutbacks (the air force being a squadron of spotty teenagers flying paper aeroplanes and the navy some toy boats in the Prime Minister’s bath), New Zealand only has one more level of escalation, which is “I hope Australia will come and rescue us”.

Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries” to “She’ll be right, mate”. Three more escalation levels remain: “Crikey!’, “I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend” and “The barbie is cancelled”. So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

….. I’m wondering what alert levels the Voodoonosity would operate from?