The Boss say’s ‘jump!’ all the bloody time.

It’s getting really annoying and breaking my train of thought.

Dear Midnight – how can I ‘dispose’ of him without anybody ever finding out and on the off chance that they did it – implicate Graham two cubicles down? Please advise, Saturday Jumper.

I have an ethical dilemma and need some Midnight.

Dear Mr Midnight

I keep getting these sensational offers emailed to me from Nigeria offering me untold wealth for little effort or outlay on my behalf. It sounds very attractive but I suspect that it might be too good to be true and possibly a little on the dodgy side.

With that in mind, I have replied to a number of these offers using a work colleagues email address and contact details. Coincidently, he seems really cranky and pissed with the world recently.

To be fair he is English and his name is Dave so his disposition is not too far from the ordinary. I must confess that I have also subscribed him to a number of adult websites over a number of years… I’m pretty sure he may have simple urges and tendencies that he is not being totally honest with himself so I figure he’d appreciate it as a helpful push towards coming out of the closet with these daily emails sent directly to his office computer.

Still it raises the ethical dilemma Mr Midnight of the rights or possible wrongs of web subscribing others even if your motivations are in good faith. Being a rabid subscriber of services yourself, and a wanton footnoter to boot, I would be curious to know your position on this. Rgds, The Saturday.

Currently the organization I toil for is restructuring and I may well be out of a job this time next week. During this week however I am scheduled to fly overseas to attend a prestigious and very expensive masterclass that I have wanted to attend for a number of years and has been pre-paid for (mostly). This trip would involve a layover in LA – I ‘ll hook up with an old mate who misses Australia terribly… well not so much Australia but rather the candy bars found here and hard to find in the US.

The question oh great Murray Midnight is – should I take a bag full of Polly Waffles or go with the safer Cherry Ripes, or ditch both for the all time fav’ Violet Crumble. Oh… and should I take the flight with all things considered? Your insight on this and the nature of pet food gravy for dogs would be appreciated.
Yours in voodooness, D’Saturday.

I am struggling with an ethical dilemma in regards to lost or misplaced money.
When is it alright to take the money and run, if ever.

Like for instance – if someone drops some money in front of you on a street, say $20, would it be reasonable to expect most people will attempt to give the cash straight back to the owner.

But what if $20 is discovered on a seat within a cinema as a session is about to start and with very little other people about. What then?

Does the amount make a difference? Say instead of $20 you found $2,000 or even $20,000. At what threshold would it be a keeper and at would level would it need to be handed in… to someone?

Does it make a difference how the money is found? For example if the money is found in an official bank bag does this make a difference? Or in a shopping bag? Bundled with bank slips or held together with rubber bands? Found in an envelope with personal documents?

I look forward to your wisdom and moral guidance on this dilemma, yours in Voodooness D.Saturday.

a) When is it ok to ‘harsh on someones mellow”?

b) Is it ok to wear thongs when your doing the ‘harshing’?

c) How ripe should the mellow really be before some serious ‘harshing’ can happen?

d) I like choc clinkers and mango puree, should the mellow be shielded from this till it is ready for the ‘harshing’?

e) Are you sure it is ‘harshing’…. I ask only ’cause it seems like it should be ‘hashing’.

D.Saturday