Comments on: The touch of death http://www.voodoologic.org/2008/01/22/the-touch-of-death/ Apply topically to relieve boredom Tue, 06 Jan 2009 07:29:05 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7 hourly 1 By: Murray @ Midnight http://www.voodoologic.org/2008/01/22/the-touch-of-death/comment-page-1/#comment-10182 Murray @ Midnight Fri, 08 Feb 2008 09:33:23 +0000 http://www.voodoologic.org/2008/01/22/the-touch-of-death/#comment-10182 I think we're all longing for another Bruce Willis or a Mel Gibson. The kind of action hero who can drag his sorry, half-beaten ass through four miles of sewerage pipe only to climb out of a toilet on a hijacked plane at 30,000 feet to beat to death a dozen terrorists with a pair of socks and a guidebook to Amsterdam. I think the closest thing we have these days is maybe Angelina Jolie. And sure, maybe she <em>can</em> take out the entire Russian Army and still make it to pre-dinner drinks wearing a little black number in which she somehow manages to hide 48 different weapons, including a bazooka, but can she get that special half-crazed look and yell "Yippie-Kaiyay, MoFo!" in a way that makes you proud to be an owner-operator of a rarely-used pair of testicles? Okay, yes, she can maybe do that too, but I still say there's room for an action hero that puts his pants on one leg at a time, if you know what I mean {And then, of course, goes and asks his wife if she's seen his car keys, his brief case, his mobile phone, his car keys, the pants he was wearing just 5 minutes ago what the hell happened to them, and his car keys. (Not to mention his socks and his guidebook to Amsterdam).}. I think we’re all longing for another Bruce Willis or a Mel Gibson. The kind of action hero who can drag his sorry, half-beaten ass through four miles of sewerage pipe only to climb out of a toilet on a hijacked plane at 30,000 feet to beat to death a dozen terrorists with a pair of socks and a guidebook to Amsterdam.

I think the closest thing we have these days is maybe Angelina Jolie. And sure, maybe she can take out the entire Russian Army and still make it to pre-dinner drinks wearing a little black number in which she somehow manages to hide 48 different weapons, including a bazooka, but can she get that special half-crazed look and yell “Yippie-Kaiyay, MoFo!” in a way that makes you proud to be an owner-operator of a rarely-used pair of testicles?

Okay, yes, she can maybe do that too, but I still say there’s room for an action hero that puts his pants on one leg at a time, if you know what I mean [1].

Footnotes:

1. And then, of course, goes and asks his wife if she’s seen his car keys, his brief case, his mobile phone, his car keys, the pants he was wearing just 5 minutes ago what the hell happened to them, and his car keys. (Not to mention his socks and his guidebook to Amsterdam).
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]]> By: Golden Grand Oaks http://www.voodoologic.org/2008/01/22/the-touch-of-death/comment-page-1/#comment-10167 Golden Grand Oaks Wed, 06 Feb 2008 00:56:56 +0000 http://www.voodoologic.org/2008/01/22/the-touch-of-death/#comment-10167 the late '80's through to the mid/late '90's had so many martial arts action stars but now they look tired. Segal and Van Damme in particular - the others, I guess straight to DVD never to be heard from again. I'm wondering who the new action heros are or are we forever stuck with Marvel Comic reprises such as Wolverine, Spiderman and the like, or worst still the childish over-the-top wrestling panto's and the chest thumping of the Extreme Fighting club. Where are they? Who are they? C'mon already! Give me the 'A' word for ACTION! the late ’80’s through to the mid/late ’90’s had so many martial arts action stars but now they look tired. Segal and Van Damme in particular - the others, I guess straight to DVD never to be heard from again. I’m wondering who the new action heros are or are we forever stuck with Marvel Comic reprises such as Wolverine, Spiderman and the like, or worst still the childish over-the-top wrestling panto’s and the chest thumping of the Extreme Fighting club. Where are they? Who are they? C’mon already! Give me the ‘A’ word for ACTION!

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